New pledge- $1 for every Cleary or Franzen point until pledges close.

Stephanie's Game Recap

I asked Stephanie to write up tonight's game recap. This is what she provided me. None of this was actually meant to be posted, but she has not given me anything other than this. So this is what you're getting.

"Tonight's game was truly one of high quality. The Wings came to win, and they played like it, too: they capitalized on every opportunity, played seamlessly, and were at the top of their game throughout every period."

"I CAN'T. I HAVE NOTHING. THERE IS NOTHING TO BE SAID. TONIGHT'S GAME CAN BE SUMMARIZED IN ONE WORD: CRAP. THAT'S ALL OF THE ELOQUENCE THAT I CAN POSSIBLY MUSTER. ATLANTA PLAYED LIKE THEY WANTED TO WIN, AND THE WINGS DIDN'T. IT'S AS SIMPLE AS THAT. THE WINGS WERE FLAT. THERE WAS NOTHING. NOTHING.

Caps totally necessary."

And the Tweet Goes On...

You see what I did there? I rhymed 'beat' with 'tweet'...

The Wings won another game tonight. This time snatching an overall poorly played game from the young, upstart, 'contenders for the Central' Blues.

The first few periods were, according to what I've been reading and hearing, disappointing. I did manage to see Yimmy's brilliant skate blade kick save to close out the first, but then I was distracted by silly little things like random shit online and throwing out/packing my belongings for my trip back to Michigan on Friday. My feed went out for a while and I just let it sit like that for a good chunk of time during the second while other pressing matters were still at hand.

Fortunately, the Wings not only came out in the third looking determined to win the game, but over a span of 4 minutes, they proved once again why they're the best team in this league when they get clicking. This is not a team you want to have an off night against. This is not a team you want to have an off period against. Or, like tonight, this is not a team you want to have an off 5 minutes against.

Yimmy is good enough of a goaltender to keep the Wings in games they should be losing. And the Wings are deadly enough that they can embarrass you for taking just one shift off.

Hell, this might just be the strategy. Only play 5 minutes worth of a game. That way, when the playoffs come, while every other team has played 82 games, the Wings will theoretically only have played 16.4 games.

HOWEVER,
there were more important things that happened tonight for the Red Wings.

Actually it was more like for one Red Wing.

But really, it was for me.

Dan Cleary, my boy -and apparently my sock puppet- scored yet again. Not just once, either. Twice. One being your tie breaking, game winning goal. Here's a running update for you:

SEASON TOTALS: 9G, 5A, +5, 41 SOG

Before my tweet: 1G, 4A, -2, 23 SOG

After my tweet: 8G, 1A, +7, 18 SOG

 

I, admittedly, was terrified that my last post was going to be a jinx. I was going to hate myself forever and for eternity if, after posting that, he came out and laid a big fat goose egg. But, I did do a little research (you know I love that research) and found he had about 22 points in about 50 games in his career against the Blues. So I felt a little better about posting it. And he rewarded my confidence in him with a great game again. He is the anti-Dennis Nedry to my John Hammond. I love that man.

Why I'm Responsible For Cleary's Streak

Okay, first things first. Go back to the second entry I ever posted on this blog. Too lazy to do that? I'll help you out. 3rd paragraph, 5th sentence:

I was a Cleary fan his first season with us, before he got awesome.

Yes. I am an obnoxious OG Cleary fan. And I will usually take every opportunity to let you know that. But, there are times that it pans out for the better. And times when it makes me look like I actually know what the fuck I'm talking about when it comes to hockey in general and the Red Wings specifically.

And wouldn't you know it, we are currently right smack dab in the middle of one of those times. My boy Dan is riding a 5 game, 6 goal scoring streak. The best of his career. Also in the midst of a 7 game, 10 point streak.

Hockey players are fickle creatures. They get hot and go cold for only God knows what reason. Far be it from me to claim to be a God, but I am here tonight to tell you just why one player has the hot hands these days.

On November 3rd, the Wings were playing a game against the Calgary Flames. At 7:11 pm PST, approximately 13 minutes or so into the game, I said "Cleary's player of the night so far." With about 2 minutes left in the game, he did something that escapes me now, but prompted me to say "There's Cleary again. Best player on the team tonight."


And what happened after that game? Keep in mind, he only had 1 assist in the game.

Yeah.
I screen capped that shit.
You know why? Because he's my boy and I CALLED THAT SHIT. And I planned on doing this bragblog a while back.

But I didn't. I kept my gloating reserved to slight little tweets here and there. Nothing major, nothing really of note. Now, those of you who follow me and actually read the bullshit I put up on Twitter might know that I'm bound to just spout out silly little things that don't really mean anything in the grand scheme of things. This time, though, one of those 'silly little things' just so happened to turn into a fucking prophecy.

Nostradamus up in this bitch.

That's me. At 9:47 pm PST (that picture above is in EST, by the way), saying to expect big things out of Cleary. That was on the 3rd. Right after that 1 assist performance against Calgary. November 3rd.


Two days later, the Wings played Edmonton. How's my boy do? 1 goal, 1 assist, +2, 3 SOG.
The next day, the Wings played Vancouver. How'd Cleary do in the loss? 1 goal, no assists, -1, 2 SOG.
On the 8th, we came home and faced Phoenix. Cleary? 1 goal, still no assists, +1 rating, 5 SOG.
The next game, an Edmonton rematch, and how'd 11 perform? 2 goals. No assists. +2. 3 SOG.
Against Colorado, just 2 days ago? Clears scored another goal, no assists, was +1, and had 2 SOG.


Here, let me break this down for you. 

SEASON TOTALS: 7G, 5A, +3, 38 SOG

Before my tweet: 1G, 4A, -2, 23 SOG

After my tweet: 6G, 1A, +5, 15 SOG

Before I opened my mouth, he was shooting at a 4% rate. Since I said something, he's shooting 40%. Goals in 5 straight games. Before that, he hadn't scored since the season opener against Anaheim. 

Is it a little cocky for me to take credit for this?

Yes, yes it is. Very much so.

Is that going to stop me?

Not a chance.

Lord help me if this post is a jinx.

NHL Refs Get It Right For Once...

...Right in the fucking face, that is.

Writer's Block, Wings Win Tonight.

The Wings won tonight in Calgary. Writer's block won tonight in California.

This is really all I got right now.

A Win's a Fucking Win

So the fucking Red Wings just won a fucking overtime game against the fucking Coyotes. Once a-fucking-gain, the Wings seemed to fucking lack some sort of fucking intensity or fucking motivation until the last fucking minute.

I watched the fucking game with a nagging fucking migraine, so I didn't take any fucking notes and sometimes zoned out, so this write-up isn't going to be all that fucking great. That having been said, here we fucking go:

The power play just looks fucking fucked these days. Sure, Kronwall has scored 2 fucking goals with the fucking man advantage in the last 2 fucking games, but on the season, the team's something like 4 for 1fucking36. Which the fucking caliber of players on this fucking team, sending a man to the fucking box against us should be a fucking automatic fucking goal like it used to seem a few fucking years ago.

And how the fuck many times am I going to have to fucking mention late fucking goals this season? Yet another goal was scored tonight with less than a fucking minute on the fucking board. Seriously, what the fuck? Did someone forget to tell the team that fucking hockey games are played in three twenty minute fucking periods? Not nine-fucking-teen. This is a fucking problem that needs to be fucking fixed ASAP.

One thing I did fucking like was how Patrick Fucking Eaves played tonight. Yeah, the silly fucker took a penalty, but he also fucking drew one, not that it fucking helped, but you know. AND SPEAKING OF DREW... Drew Miller fucking fucked Eaves up at one point of the game, which I immediately fucking called the fucking check of the fucking game. But going the fuck back to fucking Eaves, I liked his fucking play today, I liked his fucking hustle, I liked his fucking grit. He was fucking credited with the first fucking goal tonight for a little fucking while, but the fucking goal ended up being given to Pavel "Don't Fuck With Me" Datsyuk. But it was all because Eaves' fucking hustle and following up what looked to be a broken fucking play.

Other than that, the fucking team looked pretty fucking average out there. Sloppy fucking passing, missed fucking assignments, and not being able to stay on their fucking feet because the ice was all fucked. Just like the fucking Colorado game, they looked content to just get a fucking point, maybe two out of the fucking deal. This isn't going to fly for very fucking long.

But because I fucking say things like this, I'm not a fucking fan, apparently.

I've Seen Better

Well, don't I just look silly now.

I was so confident about this game, and we just go and lay a turd on center ice in a shootout. However, if you want to be the optimistic type, we did get $50 pledged to H2H2 AND still got a point at the same time. If that's not win-win, it's at least win-overtimeloss. So there's THAT.

Now let's dig into the game a little bit. That second line was still the deadliest line in the entire LEAGUE tonight, with (my boy) Franzen netting 2 goals with Filppula and Bertuzzi contributing to the cause. When that line is playing full charge, I don't think anyone can stop them. We saw what this line could do in Game 4 of the San Jose series, and I think I can speak for the whole of Hockeytown when I say that I'm relieved they haven't really lost that chemistry. We could have used a little more tonight, but this makes 2 straight games that someone on that line has had a multi-goal game.

Someone on the opposite end of that spectrum would be Doug Janik. That fight... really. If I'm Janik tonight, I'm calling everyone involved with Fight Night and personally apologizing for the sad display I put on out there. Looking like that much of a bitch in a fight against an Av, that's grounds for a public flogging in my book. And knowing that Darren McCarTHY was watching in the Versus studio just makes it worse. Speaking of McCarTHY... you can't really fault the guy on Versus for calling him that. It's not like Darren spent his entire playing career with his last name plastered across this back. OH WAIT. He did.

Pardon me while I go off on an elitist rant for a second. Calling a player by the wrong name is inexcusable unless it's one of those names that looks like the last spoonful of alphabet soup left in the bowl. These people have their names on their jerseys, and I know you fuckers have stat sheets and shit sitting in front of you. Now, maybe the educational system in America isn't what it used to be, but simple reading skills are one of the very first things I learned when I was growing up. It's not as hard to figure out how to pronounce these names as they seem to make it look. Then again, it IS harder when you're throwing random fucking letters in all willy-nilly. (LiNdstrom, McCartHy)

Okay, climbing down off of my soapbox... This game has put me squarely in the So-Sodano camp for now. He has to earn his way out of my doghouse after a game like this. He was a -3 tonight. I feel he was directly responsible for the Dupuis goal, flubbing the puck at the Av blue line and turning it over. If this is more of what were going to see from him this year opposed to the scoring-on-his-first-shot Mikey Mo we shit our pants over against Anaheim, I'm going to be unhappy. Very unhappy. The good news is we have kids that we can put in if he keeps up like this. When Abby gets back from his ribs, I say he takes over for Modano unless Mike proves he's not going to be a liability like tonight. I feel that the 4th line is looking too good right now to pull someone out just beause someone else is healthy. You have to pull someone who deserves to be pulled. Right now, I'd say it's Modano.

You might remember that last year, I had an H2H pledge for goals scored by defensemen below the top of the circles. Tonight, I noticed that was the trend again. Kronwall had a couple really good chances from the slot that he just couldn't put on the board, Stuart had a few deep chances, and I think Lidstrom clanked one off the post from inside the left circle.

They were good chances, and I'm not knocking the strategy completely, but it seemed to be too much of the gameplan and we completely abandoned the idea of point passing and moving the puck to open passing and shooting lanes. We probably could have used some movement and confusion seeing as Colorado seemed to be in the way of EVERY shot we took ever. I mentioned in the pregame post that Colorado had given up 38 shots in both of their first two games. It looks like they might have worked on that a little bit in preparation for the game tonight. And it looks like it worked because they were definitely clogging the lanes out there tonight.

Maybe it was just because Serven mentioned it, too, but it looked like most of the night, the offense was only using half of the offensive zone, trying to keep things deep. Maybe Budaj is a poor lateral mover, so that was the strategy... I don't know, I didn't write the scouting report on him. All I know is we lost tonight so I'm bitter, critical, and riding a high horse that's standing on a soapbox.



And, BOY, we all love those shootouts, don't we.
Yeah...

No.
I know there have been countless comments about how we need to take it out of the game and come up with a better way to break ties. And it looks like someone on the Wings agrees, because it looks like they completely took it out of their game. Did they even practice that at all over the summer or in training camp?
To be fair, the Wings beat Budaj at least 4 times but just went wide or hit the post or couldn't elevate the puck. That was a game we should have won. Not in regulation, but we should have taken that second point in the shootout. That was the only part of the game we played well enough to deserve that second point. If ONE of those four shots that Budaj missed goes in, Jimmy's playing well enough at the other end to seal the deal. It never should have gotten to Yip, and Yip shouldn't have scored.

Maybe it's just me, but the way the guys played tonight, they seemed content to just scrape a point away. There was no urgency when momentum was on thier side after a goal and there was no aggression when Colorado scored and we needed a good counter-punch to bring them down a peg or two. And there seemed to be a sense of complacency that led to a few goals. I mentioned Ozzie has always had a tendency to let in the late goal after that Chitcago game. Yimmy got hit twice with that tonight.

Overall, we're lucky to still be riding a point streak after that game. We certainly didn't play like the undefeated team we were coming into this contest.

But, there are bound to be more games like this. There are still (at least) 79 more to play. Some will be ridiculously good. Others will make this game look ridiculously good. That is hockey.

That is why we love it and it's also why we hate it.

Working the System (aka LOLZ)

I got this crazy idea the other day while on the phone with my girlfriend... we were discussing the crazy things the Wings fans do, and how we can change the system in place to better help the Wings and the league out. Because we ARE the most knowledgeable fan base out there. And the DO know what's best for the league. So I propose the following idea:

If you're a blogger, or an ardent follower/reader/commenter on any one of the fine blogs the Wings fans have to offer, we all enter the NHL Draft this upcoming year. Why? We infiltrate and bring down the machine from the inside out. In order to be the NHLPA Player Rep, you have to be a player, right? SO THERE YOU GO! The pieces are all falling into place now, aren't they? So let's do this*.

One of us is bound to get picked up by Edmonton or Florida or Calgary.




*Let's not really do this

"Monday" Morning Inanities

This is a Monday post because with yesterday being Columbus Day, we had work off here in the Marines. And at 4:30 last night, I started a week long vacation, so here I am, posting up in my room, pouring over stats and listening to the new episode of TP:60 and doing what I do best, which is making nothing out of nothing.

I'm looking over a couple aspects of the match up tonight. We're playing Colorado, who has given up 38 shots against in every game this season. Granted, it's been 2 games... but still. The Wings are averaging 34.5 shots per, and won both games so far, whereas Colorado has split games between Chitcago and Philly.

SPEAKING of Chitcago, apparently Toews skated the Cup out during their 15 year long ceremony the other night. You're not supposed to touch the Cup unless you win it. Skating it out after you've already played --AND LOST-- a game in a new season... You must have lost your fucking minds, Chitcago. Did you SEE what happened to us last year?! And we didn't even do anything wrong! Yet there you were, openly mocking hockey traditions, hockey superstitions, and MOST of all, the Hockey Gods.

Have fun with that.

Getting back to teams and games that DO matter, tonight will be a good night for the Wings' first line. You read it here first. The match up of Pav/Zata/Homer against Stastny/Galiardi/Stewart seems favorable for the Wings. The Colorado side is rocking an amazing cumulative -2. The Wings are a +3. That bodes well for us.


Then again, I could sit here and waste both your time and mine and type out the line-by-line matchups, but I'll take the quick way out and say this: We have the advantage. 1 v. 1, 2 v. 2, 3 v. 3, 4 v. 4, G v. G... it's all the same across the board. We have the better team, the better lines, and the better individual players. If we don't win this game, I will be shocked. And I'll put up the goals against x10 to the H2H2 pledges. Already. This early into the season. Pledges.

Now, this means one of two things. Either I'm feeling completely confident about this game, or I'm feeling completely philanthropic.

I'm taking the first option. Wings win. 5-2.

Everything in it's Right Place

Yes. Red Wings hockey is back. I am back. And what better way to come back than with a Radiohead reference?

I didn't get to see much of the game against Anaheim, but I'll touch on a little bit of what I thought to be important:



Yeah... and this.




Go ahead and skip to 1:00 into it for Yimmy facewashing Perry.

THE CHICAGO GAME

There was a lot of anticipation for this game leading up to puck drop. And I don't mean since the schedule came out. I mean after everyone was already sitting in their seats, on their couches, or in front of their computers and ready to watch some hockey.
Personally, I think the Hockey Gods looked down on me and smiled because I was having issues with internet connections and finding a feed for the game for about... 46 minutes, but by the time I found a tolerable feed, it was only the national anthem. So I didn't get to (have to) watch the festivities. I lucked out.

As for the game, hell, as for the season, that second line looks BRUTAL. They have 8 points this season. A collective +6 rating. 15 shots on goal. 2 game winners in 2 games. I know myself and a few other bloggers and knowledgeable people were coming into this season expecting big things from a healthy Franzen, a Filppula who's overdue for a breakout season, and a Bertuzzi who may or may not care (or even know) that he's often depicted as a glitter-kitten eating She-Tuzzi villian 'round these parts. And so far, they have not let us down. I am hereby declaring that line the BFF line. Because it's their initials and stuff, but also because it's a commonly used acronym and... yeah...

I do believe I'm down in the record as having been, and continuing to be Pro-Tuzzi. I even predicted his big Game Seven performance back in the Phoenix series last season, which then led to to proclaim the day to be TuzzDay, which was really gutsy of me considering it was already a Tuesday. But the point is I went out on a limb and he didn't let me down. He's working some sort of something with the boys on the second line, and it's working. I don't know if it's the pre-game glitter snooters or the intermission Patrick Eaves puppy sacrifices, but he seems to have his shit in gear this year. In my eyes, at least. Which is all that really matters since I'm the only one posting things here anymore.


Wait, I never did have co-writers, did I? Well, now would be a good time to hang up a Now Hiring sign or something.


At one point in the first period, Eaves and Miller blocked shots within a span of 5 minutes and I thought to myself "Self, you've been a supporter of those two for that exact reason for a while." And it's true. Back when they were resigned in the offseason, I posted this:

Both players stick out in my mind from the past season for their willingness to put their bodies on the line to block shots and passes. This is one of those intangible factors that don't really show up on the back of hockey cards (do they still make hockey cards?), but it's one of the major keys to success on a game to game basis, and bleeding over into seasonal success.

 For me, it's good to see them picking up right where they left off. Now, if they can just put a few good points on the board, that post from July is going to make me look like I actually know shit.


One minor cause for concern so far in this young season is the fact that the Red Wings still have yet to score a power play goal at the same time they get a shot on goal. Fil scored a PPG tonight, but let's not shit ourselves. He didn't score that goal as much as Turo let it in. It wasn't a good shot. It wasn't even a whiffed shot. I even say that it wasn't even a shot, but I'm not a statkeeper. I'm a Marine. And we're not known for our popular opinions. I know someone reading this has got the means to get Babbles on the horn and fix some shit.


The great Ozzie/Howard debate might flare up again this year. We thought that was put to bed last year. And Yimmy coming out with a shutout is a good start for him. But in the Chicago game, I thought Ozzie looked good and solid. He's always had an issue with late and weak goals, and this was no different. But in the third period, when Chicago was on a 36 minute straight man-advantage streak, he came up as big as he needed to be. He didn't make any jaw dropping saves, he didn't stone anyone on a break away, so it came across as kind of quiet. But he had positioning and angles down, so he didn't have to be flashy. He made his saves, hung on to the puck, got faceoffs, and eased the pressure quite well. If I'm a goalie in this organ-i-zation right now, I'm real happy with my start. Either one.



To sum things up: The offense is looking good. The defense is looking good. The goalies are looking good.
And Little Brother just got their banner raising pissed on by the superior team.


It's been far too long. But now everything is in it's right place.

A Comeback For the Ages

So, I've missed quite a lot of the goings on with the Red Wings since things have taken a turn for the... something. Better, worse, whatever it is. My last post was when Ilya Kovalchuk signed the first of what appears to be 17 (and counting) contract proposals. Helm was unsigned, Abdelkader was unsigned, and the Pro/No-dano debate was still well under way.

Now, instead of trying to write a mega-post to try to play catch up with all the news, which would take an enormous amount of time reading, researching and writing, I've decided to just let everything that has happened be and focus on the future and what I can cover in a timely manner.

As of right now, I'm not aware of any major happenings occurring with the team, so I'm going to do what all the good writers out there do when there's a lull in the action. I'm going to make my own news. And in keeping with that methodology, I'd like to take this time now to make a major announcement.

Today, September 3rd, 2010, I hereby announce my 100% guaranteed attendance at H2H2.

Make of that what you will.

Kovalchuk. Okay.

Your turn, Modano.

Mostly so we can get Abdelkader and Helm under contract.

NHL Cupcakes

Personally, I couldn't care less what started the NHL Cupcake hashtag meme, but apparently it has something to do with the Islanders. What mattered to me was the enormous influx of other people's humorous takes on what certain players, teams and concepts associated with the NHL would be like in an actual, anthropomorphic cupcake form.

What resulted, for me at least, was 3 straight hours of coming up with my own NHL cupcakes.

There are literally hundreds, maybe thousands, of other NHL cupcake ideas, some of which have been highlighted over at Wings Win, Eh? which you can read here.

This list is all of the ideas I came up with during my little marathon session.

• The Shoot-Out cupcake: people liked it at first, but now they've had way too many and it just sucks.
•  
• The Martin Havlat cupcake: used to have icing, but Kronwall knocked it all off.
•  
• The Bob Probert cupcake: all sold out, and will be sorely, dearly missed. 
•  
• The Fernando Pisani cupcake: makes you shit your pants.
•  
• The Larry Aurie cupcake: haunts you after you decide not to serve with with your best cupcakes.
•  
• The Ilya Bryzgakldshglaoc cupcake: you have a hard time ordering it, but is pretty cheap and it's actually an alright cupcake.
•  
• The Pavel Datsyuk cupcake: steals the toppings from all the other cupcakes. 
•  
• The Ilya Kovalchuk cupcake: should be good if someone actually buys the damn recipe already.
•  
• The Eastern Conference cupcakes: the best is only about half as good as the Western conference's best cupcake. 
•  
• The Detroit Red Wings cupcake: everyone else hates it just because it's better than their cupcakes and they can't have it.
•  
• The Jimmy Howard cupcake: might have taken 6 years to make, but thank god it was as good as it was.
•  
• The Brett Lebda cupcake: tastes like rum raisin. Minus the raisin. And minus the cupcake.
•  
• The Todd Bertuzzi cupcake: used to be good, but you ate it at breakneck speed. Now it's not so great. 
•  
• The Chicago Blackhawks cupcake: customers only know they're there when a good batch is made. 
•  
• The Sidney Crosby cupcake (part 4): only tastes good when the other cupcakes around it taste good.
•  
• The Derek Boogaard cupcake: way too pricey when all you wanted was a whisk to beat some eggs with.
•  
• The Staal cupcakes: how many are they going to make?!
•  
• The Mike Modano cupcake: might be a good addition to your dessert, but if not, you're probably good with what you already have. 
•  
• The Darren McCarty cupcake: looked really hard to eat, but was surprisingly sweet.
•  
• The Atlanta Thashers cupcake: really just a Chicago Blackhawks cupcake in a different wrapper. 
•  
• The Stan Bowman cupcake: hardly even a cupcake anymore, because he can't read Dale Tallon's recipe. 
•  
• The Gary Bettman cupcake: even after you complain about the Referee cupcake, maintains it's the best cupcake out there.
•  
• The NHL Referees cupcake: I'd like to tell you how they taste, but they're too damn inconsistent.
•  
• The Ken Holland cupcake: he makes it with a bunch of random ingredients no one else wanted to use, and still tastes great.
•  
• The Sidney Crosby cupcake (part 3): has no taste at all in the presence of the Henrik Zetterberg cupcake.
•  
• The Rick Tocchet cupcake: how much do you want to bet that it'll be delicious?
•  
• The Nick Kronwall cupcake: keep your head up while you eat it, or you may end up unconscious.
•  
• The Sidney Crosby cupcake (part 2): disappears in Jimmy Howard's catching glove. 
•  
• The Todd Bertuzzi cupcake: don't blame the cupcake if it tastes bad, Marc Crawford made it that way.
•  
• The Johan Franzen cupcake: just when you think you're about to finish it off, it scores 4 goals on you.
•  
• The Jonathan Ericsson cupcake: it's really big and hot, but it just isn't really that good.
•  
• The NBC cupcake: you never want to eat it, but sometimes you just have to, and you always end up hating it.
•  
• The Nick Lidstrom cupcake: has no icing on it, because no one can top it. 
•  
• The Pavel Datsyuk: It's never where you thought you left it and ends up behind you.
•  
• The Red Wings Cupcake: even without half of it's ingredients, it's still better than most of the cupcakes out there. 
•  
• The Kris Draper cupcake: really wishes the goalie cupcakes were doughnuts. 
•  
• The Sidney Crosby cupcake: Should just be a cake, it didn't do anything to earn a Cup.
•  
• The Gary Bettman cupcake: You pay over $7 milion for it, and tastes like Sidney Crosby's balls.
•  
• Detroit Red Wings cupcake: you get 11 in the same time it takes to make 4 Chicago Blackhawks cupcakes. 
•  
• The Vile Leino cupcake: Was supposed to be really good, but got bitter after you ate a few better cupcakes first. 
•  
• The Mikael Samuelsson cupcake: You tried to eat it in Detroit, but it kept missing your mouth.
•  
• The Gordie Howe cupcake: Will always be better than the Wayne Gretzky cupcake, no matter what. 
•  
• The Kovalchuk cupcake: Probably would be really good, but it's too expensive to even try to eat. 
•  
• The Kyle Wellwood Cupcake... wait... where'd they all go?!

How to Solve Chicago's Salary Cap Issues

I'm feeling a little generous lately. Watching the debacle that is the Chicago Blackhawks' salary cap situation got me feeling sorry for them, so me and a few budding capologists compiled a list of the best ways to solve the problems heading into the upcoming season. If you've got a few ideas that aren't on the list, leave them in the comments section, or drop me a line over on Twitter and I'll get them to Stan Bowman.

So without further ado, here are the options to fix Chicago's salary cap troubles:

1. Bake sale every 2nd Sunday of the month. (I hear Marian Hossa makes a pineapple upside down cake that is to die for.) 
2. Hold a monthly bottle drive to pay players under the table, lessening their cap hits. (Take these forty million bottles to the store, will you?) 
3. Restructure contracts providing 18 players playing for free each year. (We'll pay you next year, we swear!) 
4. Identity fraud to pass stars as AHL call-ups (Shmantii Shmiemi who?) 
5. Naming the arena after free agents to lessen their salary (Kovalchuk-Modano Arena, anyone?) 
6. Also, sell the ad space on the boards to players (Imagine Slava Kozlov getting checked into his own board ad. Hilarious!) 
7. Renting players on a per game basis. (Don't bother buying a jersey.) 
8. Organize an 20-piece team band and book battle-of-the-band gigs on off nights. (Rookies carry the veterans' guitar cases now.) 
9. Dressing only 2 lines per game. (Your TOI league leader, Patrick Sharp, averaging 43 minutes a game.) [Andy] 
10. Opening an Official Chicago Blackhawks Etsy page. (Buy a Patrick Kane charm bracelet, complete with 2 dime charms.) [Lola] 
11. Borrowing players from the NBA's Atlanta Hawks. (I'm sure Gary's still got David Stern's number on speed dial and would allow it.)
12. League wide key party. (Hey, you pulled Hjalmarsson's key after all, San Jose!) 
13. Rent the "Day(s) With the Cup" out to the other members of the Atlanta Thrashers. (I mean, who doesn't want to see Evander Kane with the Cup instead of Patrick Kane?) [Tom] 
14. Auction players out for dates with bidding women, or men... (Hey, depending on how the date goes, that bonus doesn't count against the cap next year!) [Cath] 
15. Register as a 501(c)(3) tax exempt religious organization. Change uniform to saffron robes and require all players to go bald. (On the plus side, no extra penalties for not tying it down in a fight!) [Christine] 
16. Along with that ...accept charitable donations and sell cult pamphlets in airports for extra cash. (Isn't that how they got most of their 'fans' this year, anyway?) [Christine] 
17. Pay players in Chicago style deep dish pizza. (May be counter productive due to condition coaches' raises, though.) [Andy] 
18. Instead of Santas working for Salvation Army, they could put Vince Vaughn on the street ringing a bell next to the kettle. (The fake Santa beard is about as genuine as their playoff beards will be this year.) [Marlon] 
19. Put Liz's dad in net for $100 bucks and a deep dish. (Fuck your league minimum, that's an expensive pizza!) [Liz]
20. Relocate to Osaka, Japan, one of their sister cities. (What's your CBA say about yen, Gary?!)
21. "The Official Chicago Blackhawks Lemonade Stand" (Just don't let Patrick Kane be the cashier.) [Marlon] 
22. NOT signing Derek Boogaard to a 6.6 million dollar contract over 4/5 years. (There's not really any better punchline that I can come up with...) [Marlon] 
23. Wearing Penguins jerseys and getting a blind eye from Gary. (Also saves money on Halloween costumes!) [Pete] 
24. Step one: Call MacGyver. Step two: Give him some gum, a stapler, a fax machine, and a copy of the CBA. (Assuming they can afford all those supplies) [Kris]
25. Sign the members of the band Chicago. (I'll take "Baby, What a Big Surprise" over "Chelsea Dagger" any day. And that's how we'll all feel when they score.)

HATE (pt II)

So, a few months back, I was asked my opinion on why I thought the Red Wings were so hated among the fans of the other teams in the league by Jenn from Hockey Blogette for an article she was working on. What I wrote in response basically grew into another post of it's own.

However, somewhere along the line, things got mixed up, people got busy, and it just stayed in a folder on my desktop, fading into nothingness.

This is my response, my personal reasons and feelings why the Red Wings get so much hate from outside of Hockeytown.

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

Why do hockey fans hate the Red Wings?

I can come up with three solid, equal ideas. Some people fall into all 3 categories. Some only fall into 1. Ignorance, jealousy, and pride.

Ignorance: This is the reason I think is most applicable to the fans who hate the Red Wings. These are the fans who like their team, but don't like hockey. These are the fans who don't know the ins and outs of the game, let alone the business behind it. They think that the Red Wings are the New York Yankees of hockey. They saw the big free agent signings and the wins that came along with it and assume that the Red Wings were out buying Cups. They didn't bother to look into the deals and the inner workings of the organization to see what was really going on. They didn't see the pay cuts players took to open salary room to get the free agents to sign. And they didn't see the players ignoring larger, more lucrative contracts from teams on the bottom rungs of the NHL ladder and making less money all for a chance to win the Cup.
They never looked into our draft picks and saw that a lot of the major cogs of the dynasty were put in place by smart, tenacious scouting and excellent drafting. They never saw the trades made to bring in low key role players.
All they saw was the superstars raising the Cup.
Another major reason I think that the Wings are hated by pseudo-fans due to ignorance is because they so often get put in their place by Red Wings fans. They open their mouths in the playoffs or on message boards online-- and Red Wings fans, who are far more knowledgable, often shut them up. They like to pick out the trivial, useless things and try to attack the Wings and their fans using them. Wings fans don't back down once you call them out, so they often get labeled as "assholes" or "pricks" and that translates over to the team itself. Even if the Detroit supporters are polite, tactful, and receptive, they still get put down because they so effectively crush the dreams and spirit of the other fans. So Detroiters and the Red Wings all get thrown under the bus.


Jealousy: When the Red Wings have won more Cups in the past 20 years than some teams have playoff game wins, fans are going to get jealous. They're going to be angry that their teams just can't bring it all together like the Red Wings can. They're going to kind of revere the Red Wings, but they don't know how to show it. They get so much respect for the Wings and what they've done for the past 2 decades that it festers inside of them and turns into a hate.
Like the way you hate your neighbor for buying that nice new car or the beautiful addition he puts on his house. You wouldn't hate him if you knew how to do what he was doing right and could do it for yourself. If there was more parity in the league, the Red Wings wouldn't have so many haters.

Pride: There are, believe it or not, true fans of the other teams in the NHL. Usually, they're quiet and reserved because, well, they don't have much to cheer about. And that's because the Red Wings always put a good old fashioned ass whooping on them. They get so tired of having their teams' seasons ended or just being embarrassed by the Red Wings that they have no choice but to hate them. To them, the Wings are like that drunk guy at the party that comes in and pukes on the new couch and starts a fight. Everyone's having a good time, and then the Wings come in and spoil the mood. It's the more justified of the 3 reasons, but it still has it's ties into jealousy.

But the worst part about all of this is that the Wings are so hated across the league because they're just too good, but as soon as they slip up or don't do so great, they have all these haters digging a new grave in the hopes to start dancing on it soon.

The Red Wings literally can't win for losing.

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

Be sure to read Jenn's full post on the subject HERE. It's far more knowledgeable and in depth than mine is.

What July Has Meant for the Wings

We're one whole week into July, and thus one whole week into the NHL's free agency period. The Wings have been laying relatively low for the time being, not having signed any new faces to the team. Mike Modano aside, (we'll get to him later, trust me) there hasn't even been any big name courting.

This does not mean Ken Holland hasn't been busy. So far, he's inked Drew Miller and Patrick Eaves, both for one year, sub-one million dollar contracts. And word on the street is that he's close to signing many, if not all of our RFAs (the ones we actually want back).

I think this means a lot for this team for this upcoming season.

Why?

It's funny you should ask that, because I'm going to explain right now.

Signing 2 players isn't going to make or break a team. Any team. But this doesn't mean it's not important. This is what I see these signings meaning next season:

One of the most important things signing these two players shows to me is that our PK is going to be alright. Both players stick out in my mind from the past season for their willingness to put their bodies on the line to block shots and passes. This is one of those intangible factors that don't really show up on the back of hockey cards (do they still make hockey cards?), but it's one of the major keys to success on a game to game basis, and bleeding over into seasonal success.

Another thing I see happening as a result of these two signing is I think they're going to be even more productive on the other end of the ice, especially Miller. Miller only put up 4 goals his first year in college, following that up with 17 the next year, in one less game. Continue further into his career and you'll see that in 06-07 in the AHL, he scored 16 goals in 79 games for the Portland Pirates. In 07-08, playing again for the Portland Pirates (which was interrupted with a 3 game playoff stint with the Ducks) he put up 16 goals again, but in only 31 games. He seems like a player that grows in leaps and bounds when he gets a chance to stick to a single system or program. He really hasn't had much of a chance to prove himself in the NHL like that, bouncing back and forth from Anaheim to Portland/Iowa. Hopefully this year he can keep up the pattern he's shown in the past and light the lamp a good number of times more than this year, which wasn't too shabby at 10 goals in 66 games.
Eaves, on the other hand hasn't shown any clear cut pattern or consistency, but he seems to be doing well in the Wings' style of play. He's routinely been about a 50/50 player, with career goals and career assists sitting at 57 and 55, respectively (including college and US team stats). In the Red Wings system, he put up the 3rd highest point total of his NHL career in 10 games fewer than his highest scoring season. I can easily see Mike Babcock turning him into a 20+ goal scorer this year, something he's only done once.

Their confidence is going to be higher, leading to improved all around play. Resigning with the Red Wings shows them that they're wanted around here. They weren't just bandages here to stop the bleeding from last year's traitors --I mean free agent departures-- and injuries. This year, they're coming in with a spot on the team more than likely waiting for them, and the support of familiar teammates as well as becoming fan favorites/fakeboyfriends.

I see good, 'breakout' seasons coming for both of these guys. I just hope they don't make me eat these words later.


The Modanos and Their Fucking Flag.
As a kid growing up in Westland and watching hockey, you knew Mike Modano was from around the area. How many people knew exactly where? I did. In the neighborhood directly to the west from mine, for the entire hockey season, in the shadows of the countless Red Wing car and house flags, flew a single Dallas Stars flag. I always had a love/hate relationship with Mike Modano. I liked him for being a hometown boy. Not just in the sense of being from my own state, like the Hatchers or Rafalski, but in the sense of "I know where your parents live, and you went to high school with my aunt". I hated him because he always seemed to do well against my beloved Red Wings, and how dare you do that to the team you undoubtedly grew up watching and loving.
I have a feeling that if/when he signs with the Red Wings this year, it'll be basically the same thing. I'll love it because he'd be coming home to finish his career, and it definitely would be a heartwarming story, but at what cost? Will him signing mean another player that we've already had a spot for gets the axe? Will him signing become a liability due to his old age and unfamiliarity with the way the Wings play?
In my heart, I want him to sign, play, succeed, and everything ends sometime in early June with Lidstrom handing the Cup to him. In my head, however, the risks outweigh the rewards. But to be completely honest, I'm still completely split on how I feel about him coming to the team.




Also, in regards to our former #22: good fucking riddance, Butt Sucking Lips.

NHL Draft 2010

I really wanted to update my blog for the draft, but I really don't have much of anything to say.

That's all.

HATE

This is the blog I've been putting off writing for a while because I know it's going to alienate some of my friends and readers on here, but it's something that I feel very strongly about, so I have to get it off of my chest.

That having been said, if you were rooting for the Chicago Blackhawks in the Stanley Cup Finals, you might want to go to another blog and not read mine right now.


I've seen the back and forth between Red Wings fans and who they were supporting in the Finals. It looked pretty even down the middle, 50% Chicago and 50% Philadelphia. I've seen everyone try to justify their choices with this reason and that reason.
Personally, I don't see any justification for rooting for the Blackhawks while claiming to be a Red Wings fan.
I'm sorry. I just don't.

Chicago is the probably the cockiest group of players, fans and management that I've ever seen in the NHL.
 How do you think you're a good team when you've sucked for so long that the league basically had to hand you good players to make you at least competitive and then subsequently hand you the Cup? How can you see that as a legitimate reason to be so cocky?

Chicago has been one of the biggest rivals/thorns in the side of the Red Wings since there were only 6 teams playing.
The intense hatred we all used to have over the Avalanche just fizzled out and faded away over the years. Colorado seems to have returned the favor. We don't hate each other anymore, and there's no real reason to. Chicago, on the other hand, has consistently chanted "Detroit sucks" at games that the Wings weren't even playing in throughout the past however many seasons. Which was a pretty lofty claim from a fanbase who's team was finishing last in the division and the conference. So now that they've won that big, shiny, silver trophy, I'm sure it's about prime time to change their tune and just embrace their success, right?
NOPE.

There's just something that stirs the doubt in my mind if you can jump ship from the classiest, best run organization in the league to the cockiest, clusterfuckiest organization.

So, yes. If you rooted for the Chicago Blackhawks in the Finals, I believe that you are less of a Red Wings fan.

Resurrected Blog (AKA Rivals?)

I'm resurrecting this old blog post from January 10th of this year, so some of the references may be a little outdated. But I feel like this is a decent prequel to a blog I might write in the upcoming days that will probably alienate half of my readers, all 8 of you.

There Are More Important Controversies Within The Red Wings…

Lately, with the (impressive, unexpected, heaven-sent, over-achieving, amazing, whatever adjective you feel like throwing in yourself) play of Jimmy Howard, there’s been a lot of talk about a brewing number one goalie controversy in Detroit. Nobody within the organization has come out and admitted Jimmy’s taking the number one spot from Chris Osgood, and Jimmy still won’t talk about it like he should (as in, “Oh, yeah, I’m the man, I rule, I’m so awesome, suck on THAT, naysayers.”) But when he’s putting up stats where he’s only in the bottom of the NHL pile in PIMs (0 for 31st place) and OTLs (2/30th), and beating big-name goalies like Luongo, Kipprusoff and Nabokov and, well, Osgood in stats like GAA and SV%, I think it’s safe to assume he’s the man to beat on the Red Wings’ depth chart.

Let’s put it this way… he’s top 10 in those stats even when compared to any NHL player who’s played a game as a goalie this season. That means adding Ottawa’s Mike Brodeur’s 1 game, 1 goal against average to the list and New Jersey’s Yann Denis’ 4 game .929 save percentage. Top 10. In the entire league. In the entire position.

So now that that’s been put to bed, I think it’s time we turn our eyes to a more pressing controversy for the Red Wings and their fans.

Which team out there deserves the title of being our number one rivalry?
Which team is the one that the players and the fans circle on their calendars the day the NHL season schedule comes out and says “That’s our big game!” Which team is the team that, no matter what the standings, no matter the time of the year, you just want to see them get pummeled on the ice and on the scoreboard. Which team is going to give the Red Wings that little extra spark to their game because it’s a personal game?

Many people make a case for the usual suspects: the Ducks, the Blackhawks, the Blue Jackets, the Predators, and the Penguins of the world. My school of thought is that if there are that many viable options out there for a fan such as myself, then really, none of them are options at all.

Think back from the mid-90s to the early 2000s. Who was it then? Hands down, the Colorado Avalanche. Anyone who said otherwise was just wrong. It was such a brutal rivalry that it still lingers to this day in the hearts and the minds of the Wings faithful. Any time you see that goofy maroon and teal color combination, admit it, you still get that tightening in your stomach that makes you long for the better, bloodier days. (Oh, and according to a little research, the official team colors are “burgundy and steel blue, black, silver and white”. Whatever.)

I don’t know any team in the league right now that does that to me, or to other fans. I can’t pinpoint a team that is just so hated, that even if their nicest, most charitable, most talented player was up for free agency or on the trading block, we’d still not like him in the Winged Wheel. I can’t think of a team that when a Wings player leaves in the off-season and signs with them, it’s considered a personal slight and grounds for death or at the very least the sacrifice of their first born to make amends.

The problem with today’s Wings -and today’s NHL, actually- is that the league got exactly what it wanted when it went to the new(er) schedule format. The 6 games against inter-division teams certainly did a lot to manufacture rivalries, but the passion just isn’t there.

Yes, it’s easy to get physical when you’re playing a team that you just played last week, and now’s your opportunity to get back at their 4th liner goon for that slash on your star player near the end of the 3rd period when the game was already settled. And yes, it’s easy to build up the pressure and the atmosphere when you’re playing the team that’s just 5 points ahead of you in the standings in a home-at-home weekend series with little less than a month left in the season.

But it’s not easy to just force two teams together to the point where just the mere sight of their jersey makes you see red, where you change the channel when Sportscenter plays the highlights of that team’s latest win (HA! Like that ever happens anymore, but bear with me…), where you turn on your NHL video games and turn injuries all the way up and difficulty all the way down so you can embarrass them just the way you like it.

Calgary has Vancouver.
Boston has Montreal.
New York has… New York, I guess.

Detroit has, ummmm…


I don’t want to live in a world where I can’t go up to a fellow Red Wings fan and mention [Team X], and know that I’ll soon get a front row seat to their dark side’s emergence.

2 Years, 4 Teams, 82 Picks

The past two years, the NHL has seen 4 different teams in the Stanley Cup Finals. I made the comment on Twitter the other day about sucking until you're good. I wanted to back up that statement, so all morning, I've been sifting through 10 years of drafts, analyzing and comparing. I'm only looking at the first and second round right now.

To help you read this chart, I've listed the draft year, followed by 1st round picks, then 2nd round picks, then a cumulative total of picks listed.

Detroit	Chicago	Pittsburgh	Philadelphia
1999= 0/1 0/2 (0) 2000= 1/1 1/2 (2) 2001= 0/1 1/2 (1) 2002= 0/1 2/2 (2) 2003= 0/1 1/2 (1) 2004= 0/1 0/2 (0) 2005= 1/1 1/2 (2) 2006= 0/1 3/2 (3) 2007=  1/1 0/2 (1) 2008=  1/1 0/2 (1) 2009= 0/1 2/2 (2)	1999= 1/1 2/2 (3) 2000= 2/1 1/2 (3) 2001= 2/1 1/2 (3) 2002= 1/1 1/2 (2) 2003= 1/1 2/2 (3) 2004= 1/1 4/2 (5) 2005= 1/1 2/2 (3) 2006= 1/1 2/2 (3) 2007= 1/1 2/2 (3) 2008= 1/1 0/2 (1) 2009= 1/1 1/2 (2)	1999= 1/1 2/2 (3) 2000= 1/1 1/2 (2) 2001= 1/1 1/2 (2) 2002= 1/1 1/2 (2) 2003= 1/1 1/2 (2) 2004= 1/1 2/2 (3) 2005= 1/1 1/2 (2) 2006= 1/1 1/2 (2) 2007= 1/1 1/2 (2) 2008= 0/1 0/2 (0) 2009= 1/1 1/2 (2)	1999= 1/1 0/2 (1) 2000= 1/1 0/2 (1) 2001= 1/1 0/2 (1) 2002= 1/1 0/2 (1) 2003= 2/1 0/2 (2) 2004= 0/1 0/2 (0) 2005= 1/1 0/2 (1) 2006= 1/1 3/2 (4) 2007= 1/1 1/1 (2) 2008= 1/1 0/2 (1) 2009= 0/1 0/2 (0)

Here's a quick text style breakdown:
Detroit has had 15 early round picks since 1999, only 4 in the first, and 11 in the second. (One interesting thing to note is that Kopecky, our 2nd round pick in 2000, is now on Chicago.)
Chicago has had 31 (THIRTY-ONE?!) early round picks in the same time span, including 13 first round picks. They have had nearly the same amount of first round picks as the Red Wings have had first and second round picks combined, on top of 18 second round picks.
Pittsburgh picked 22 players in the first and second rounds, 10 in the first rounds and 12 in the second.
Philadelphia rounds out the list with having only 14 first and second round picks, which is the lowest amount for any team here. But it's a very front loaded draft, with 10 picks being in the first round and only 4 picks coming in the second round.

So what does that mean?

In my eyes, it means they've been drafting Cup teams, unlike the Wings, who develop Cup winning teams.

No, I Didn't Die When the Red Wings Lost (aka Who Now?!)

Yeah, I fully intended on writing a wrap-up of some sort. Either about the game 5 loss, or a season review, or at least SOMETHING instead of just letting this website atrophy in neglect.

But things happened.

Personal things happened to me, personal things happened to my best friends, things happened to my computer... A lot of things happened.

So here we are now, a full series after the Wings were eliminated from the playoffs, one game into the Stanley Cup Finals, and Red Wings Nation is in a bit of a pickle. We're not really used to having hockey without the Wings playing, and we just do not know where our loyalties need to lie now. Chicago. Philadelphia. The cons for either team definitely outweigh the pro.


So who should we really pull for now?

Do we root for Chicago, hoping to keep the Cup in the West, keep it in the division, and deal with having to hear from Chicago fans who pull their heads out of their asses long enough to say some smarmy, cocky, stupid comments?
Do we root for Philadelphia, hoping that Chicago gets theirs, knocks them down a peg, shatters their pride, but have to see Ville Leino hoist a Cup after getting it handed to him by Pronger?

Or do we just boycott the whole thing, not pay attention, and look forward to the 2 biggest days coming up, July 1st and opening day?

Well, one of the things that sets us Wings fans apart from half of the other teams' fans is that we're all legitimate hockey fans, too, so I don't think that we'll be able to just block everything out. Judging from what I saw tonight on Twitter, most of us were still watching the game (although not really tweeting as much about it as when, you know, the GOOD team plays...) and still getting our hearts -and our brains- ripped out by everything NBC chose to broadcast.

But we tough it out. Despite watching two teams we all have a solid case for hating play for the trophy that belongs to us. Despite having to put up with some of the most useless, asinine comments and "analysis" the NBC/Versus/non-FSD crews come up with. Despite having come *this* close to swearing off hockey for good about 159 times during the regular season/playoffs. We stick around.

And I'm going to to that here, too. So don't worry.

I'd Hate to Say I Told You So

Last night was probably as good of a Wings game as I've ever experienced. The game was good. The company was good. And then hearing/seeing that Pittsburgh lost, too, was good.

First off, I'd like to post out here in the public domain that my good friend Caitlin's dad called the game a 6-1 win about 30 minutes before puck drop. That man needs to keep making predictions like that.

We arrived a few minutes late due to some miscommunication between some of my friends, and almost as soon as I sat down (in my Franzen jersey, no less), the goals starting coming. So, with all due respect to the Red Wings Commune, I think I'll be sitting out the next few games with you, because I've found my new superstitious hot spot.

I mentioned yesterday that I woke up feeling fine, no worries or anxiety. I BASICALLY guaranteed a win. I called out a few people for their negativity and how quickly they lost hope.

I'd hate to say I told you so, but I told you so. Let's go over my last game post and key in on a few points.

We've seen this Wings club playing at their top level, and we know that they're completely capable of looking unbeatable. 

 It sure looked that way last night, didn't it? I made the quip in the third period that they could give up 5 goals and we'd still win the game. That's a good feeling.

If that happens, we can probably count on the Sharks' penchant for choking to take over.

 They sure seemed to unravel towards the end of that game, didn't they? Of course, the original context of the statement was in regards to winning 2 in a row. But if the Wings come out with 50% of what they came with last night, that's still a 3-2 win.

Jimmy needs to play like he's still earning his place on this team.

28 saves on 29 shots. Some of them big saves. Sounds to me like a good case-making performance in a high pressure situation. Like a bona fide starter.

Our goal scorers need to score. Score goals. This means you, Franzen, Bertuzzi.

Franzen was Franzen. Bertuzzi was... Franzen. 11 points between the 2 of them, with 5 goals. The extra 6 points were just icing on the cake. The entire rest of the team combines for 8 points.

And they need to score with their sticks.

As far as I can tell, the only video review involved in last night's game was to verify that the puck went in off of Bertuzzi, not to tell if it was a good goal or not. That's how these games need to be played.


So that's one. Great job, Wings. Really, spectacular.

Now forget about it.

Come Saturday, this win won't mean anything except another plane ride to and from California. Don't think about how you walked all over them and made them look foolish. Don't think that it's going to be that easy again. Just think about the fact that you did it. You can beat this Sharks team. If you can blow this team out of the water like that, you can definitely scrap together an ugly win if you have to. Then another one. And then another one. Until you're booking flights to Vancouver. Or Chicago.

In Defense of Tin Foil, Part I

Hi.

I'm Robert Masters, writer of Etched In Cold, and apparently tin foil hat whacko nutjob #1.

You might have linked to this site from the article in the Free Press, or the link on Snapshots, and expecting to come across some delusion-driven bring Gary down rebel blog.

You'll be disappointed.

Instead, what you'll find is a blog written by a fun, silly, no-name blogger who's suddenly coming under fire from Bettman's personal Brainwash Army from all corners of the NHL world. (It's a fucking joke. Calm down.)

The Tin Foil Flash Mob was playing on the unrealistic idea that had been floating around from the fans of other NHL teams that we were all whiny conspiracy theorists who sat in basement bunkers wearing tin foil hats to avoid the NHL brainwashing, television reception be damned.
We embraced it. As a joke.
Kind of like how someone who mispronounces a word continues to use the same butchered pronounciation to poke fun at themselves, we all started referencing the need for tin foil hats whenever something suspicious happened in a Red Wings game. And it grew. The same way that internet memes and Justin Beiber have. There's no real rhyme or reason for it to become popular, but it has.

About Tuesday:
The Flash Mob was never intended to be a Mecca for Bettman haters and conspiracy theorists. It was thought up by Sara as a fun, tongue-in-cheek way to create a little buzz for the people going to the game. Hang out a little, make some new friends, and poke a little bit of fun at our selves. Maybe make a few people laugh and get a little more energy heading into the game, and maybe it would translate onto the ice.
We went there with the intent to recruit some people into the dance to Stompin' Tom Connors. Not to drink our Kool-Aid. We did it to get together and have a good time, as the Red Wings Commune often does. We did it to be a part of the pre-game atmosphere and the excitement surrounding a home playoff game.

If it was meant to be a real protest or psuedo-political movement, don't you think we would have made signs and come up with a few better chants other than the "Let's Go Red Wings" chant we started, like, "Brainwashing's scary! Down with Gary!" or something like that?

And maybe made tin foil hats that didn't blow off in the wind.

It was a joke. Simply put. To anyone who's lambasting us for what we did, you're the ones who are taking it too far. And maybe even adding a little fuel to the fire. If there weren't some underground movement to knock the Wings and their fans down a peg, why would you be so adamant to call us out for being off the mark and being nuts? Trying to throw the bloodhounds off the scent, are you? (Again, I'm kidding!)

All we've really said -as a group- is that there have been some questionable calls made in the series and over the course of the season. Yes, we'd like some consistancy, and is that too much to ask for from professionals? I can understand little league refs screwing up a call or two because they have other jobs in their life. When you're being paid to just call hockey games, maybe a little personal pride should come into play when you're working a game.

As far as being spaced out, delusional, crazy, tin foil hat donning, NHL hating Ewoks, we're FAR from that.

We're just silly people who had a silly idea and did some silly things.

The rest of you made it serious.

Check back in tomorrow for more regarding FoilGate

Well, We Won 7 in a Row Earlier This Year...

Okay.

I've calmed down a little bit. I narrowly avoided doing something hasty regarding my face and a razor. I smoked a few cigarettes. I punched a few walls. I entertained the idea of drinking straight through to game 4.

And I came up with a few conclusions.

I'm not losing all hope. Momentum, she is a fickle mistress. Remember Lidstrom's red line shot in 2002 that turned the series around and eventually led us to a Cup? Things happen in sports. Things no one can foresee. To use the old cliche, that's why they play the games. And there's still a game here on Thursday left to be played. One lucky bounce or, as we saw in game 2, broken stick, and this thing could turn around quick, fast, and in a hurry.

Game 3 is really the only game that the Red Wings were truly beaten. Game 1 was close enough to be a comfortable loss. Game 2 was that horrendous PK fest.

So why should we assume that the Wings CAN'T pull off the improbable comeback?

The general idea going into this series was that the Wings could pull it off in 5 games. Well, that's where we're at now. 5 games. One already in the books. 4 to go.

We've seen this Wings club playing at their top level, and we know that they're completely capable of looking unbeatable. We know that when the game is left to the 6 guys in with sticks in their hands, they can be the best team in the league. (That may or may not have been my obligatory "the officiating sucks" statement.) What remains to be seen is if they can rattle off a string of 2 or 3 of those games and put the Sharks back on their heels.

If that happens, we can probably count on the Sharks' penchant for choking to take over.

But what needs to happen for that to come to fruition?
Jimmy needs to play like he's still earning his place on this team. Because who's to say that he's not? Will the front office give him a get-out-of-jail-free card if he plays like he did tonight? Or will they look for another veteran goaltender to help him on his way to being a bona fide starter? Hell, Nabokov's becoming a free agent this summer...

Our goal scorers need to score. Score goals. This means you, Franzen (I don't have to validate that, do I?), Filppula (no goals since game 3 against Phoenix), Cleary (just 2 points, but they're both goals),  and everyone's favorite washing machine impersonator, Bertuzzi (2 goals in game seven, but only one hit the stat sheet). Get it, washing machine... spin cycle... spin-o-rama... Hey, don't fault me for trying to lighten the mood in Red Wings nation when we clearly need it. Anyway, the point is that 46% of our goals have been scored by 3 forwards. Zetterberg, Datsyuk and Holmstrom.

And they need to score with their sticks. I got into the habit today of not celebrating a goal until the puck had dropped to begin play again. Because you never know what's going to be reviewed and called back these days. I can't remember seeing as many video reviews in my LIFE as I've seen this year alone. We need good, solid, clean, legal, sure goals. Don't leave anything in the hands of an outsider.



 We've seen the way this team bounced back from game 6 against Phoenix. So far, they're undefeated this year in elimination games. So, I guess statistics are on our side. Let's keep that up. Let's come out Thursday with something to prove and nothing to lose. If they do, and pull out the W, they can rebuild a little of the faith that was lost today. And just keep rolling.

You've Got Mail, San Jose

I missed about 38 minutes of the game yesterday, as I was about 10 minutes away from the Hockeytown Cafe at the Hard Rock Cafe, watching my friends' band win a spot in the national finals for a spot in the Hard Rock Calling festival and to play with Pearl Jam, Stevie Wonder and Sir Paul McCartney. The rest of the confirmed line up is on that link.


What I did manage to see was somewhat impressive if you look at the big picture. The Wings were looking good in the third period, looking like they DIDN'T just finish a hard hitting, hard fought 7 game series on Tuesday. Many of the other bloggers have mentioned it, but I feel the same way, so I'll say it again.
If I'm the Sharks, that scares me.

If they can only win by ONE goal (scored on a bullshit 5-on-3), having been able to rest since April 24, they should be scared.
If the Red Wings stay close in this game WITHOUT a goal from Datsyuk or Zetterberg, they should be scared.
If the Red Wings stay close in this game WITHOUT a goal on the power play, they should be scared.
If the Red Wings... you know what? Fuck it.

We've seen how this team can bounce back from deflating losses, like the loss in game 6 and the way they played in game 7.

We knew that this series wasn't exactly going to be a cakewalk. We had hoped to maybe sneak in under the radar and steal game one from the Sharks, and we almost did. But the message was sent, and I'm pretty sure the Sharks got it. I think it went something like this:

"To the fine coaching staff and athletes of the San Jose Sharks organ-i-zation,

We would like to respectfully decline your offer to showcase your God-given talent and NHL-given advantage over us. We would also like to propose a counter offer to scrap a very respectable loss together out of a situation what would make other teams collapse faster than Brett Lebda at an open bar. Furthermore, we would like to issue the following warning:

Just you fuckers wait until Sunday.

Bitches.

Sincerely, the Detroit Red Wings organ-i-zation"

Keep your chins up, Red Wings Nation.

Revisiting the Sharks

This is an old post from my first blog. Let's take some time out and enjoy the success we've had against San Jose this year.

Dismantling the Sharks.
24 days and 11 games after putting a hurting on the Sharks in their own arena, the Wings returned. And apparently the blood was still in the water. After giving up 2 goals within the first 10 minutes of the game, which I’ll just chalk up to jetlag, the Wings woke up and made the Sharks look more like the Guppies.

Consider this: 9 SOG for the Sharks in the first 9:45 of the 16-shot 1st by the Sharks. 8 SOG in the entire 2nd period, and 10 over the course of the whole 3rd period. Take out those 9 shots that occurred before the Wings collectively decided to get their shit in order, and you’re left with 25 shots on Yimmy Howard. Sounds familiar, doesn’t it? Comfortably familiar. Like the Red Wings of yesteryear.

For about 39 seconds in the first period, on a penalty kill no less, Kronwall was stuck out on the ice with what amounted to one operational skate. The blade on his right skate -for some reason- came off while he was applying pressure on Ryane Clowe.

I don’t think that he really got enough credit for this last night (as all of Hockeytown was freaking out about him being possibly injured again), but I checked out the video from that again and one thing jumped out at me. From his knees, and then on one skate, he kept playing. He got in passing and shooting lanes, and doing it pretty well, I might add. Definitely an underrated moment in the game last night.

I’ve been saying it, you’ve been saying it… Yimmy needs to work on his rebound control. It’s been getting better, I guess, but both San Jose goals were directly related to his inability to control the rebounds.

Kronwall tweaked his ankle in a behind-the-play little piece of interference by Ortmeyer during Cleary’s goal. I’m positive of this. Yes, he went over and did his congratulations and all that, but he bent in a way I’d feel bad doing to Gumby. He also took a while to get off the ice. I’m not certain on his ice time after that, but I’d bet all the money in my left pocket that THAT was when it happened.

Meech’s goal was that really ugly kind of pretty. It was a nice Tic-Tac-Toe-TOE goal. Williams faked the shot, dropped it to Filppula, who then draws the defense towards the middle of the ice before passing down to Bertuzzi near the goal line. Bertuzzi made the smart play and tried to get it to (my boy) Cleary. Luckily, for all of us, and especially Bert, Meech was wandering around along the side boards aimlessly and stumbled across the puck. He decided he liked the puck, and he was gonna put it in the net so he’d know where to find it later. Despite Nabokov’s best efforts at breakdancing, it went in, and we actually had a lead. Exactly 15 people felt comfortable with that lead.

How Eaves hasn’t been offered a contract extension at this point is beyond me. He’s one of our best PKers, and he’s got a knack for getting the big, timely goal. He was at it again last night, perhaps with a bit of luck and stupidity from the Sharks. I can’t find a good replay online right now, but Joe Pavelski falls down, taking Eaves down with him as Eaves tries to skate around. Eaves slid farther than Pavelski did, creating the space that led to Eaves’ wide open goal.
I’d also like to add that Rafalski’s pass on that goal was harder than Brad May’s best slapshot.
And last, Helm went for a leisurely stroll with about 15 seconds left in the game and just happened to beat every Sharks player on the ice to negate an icing with 9 seconds left. Not that an icing there would have changed the outcome of the game. Even if San Jose scored on the subsequent offensive zone faceoff, they would have needed to score another goal in what would have probably been 5 seconds against relatively rested Wings. But it was still that grit and determination that we’ve all become so enamored with from him.

Tonight is a game against Anaheim, newly equipped with Vesa Toskala and Jason Blake from the weekend’s trade with Toronto. Another late start, so if you’re not like me and actually have somewhere to go or something to do tomorrow morning, I’d recommend taking a nap now. Well, maybe take it after you finish reading this.

The questions, of course, are going to be the same they usually are: Do the Wings have enough in the tank after the game last night in the Tank? Can Yimmy control rebounds enough tonight to steal a game, or are we going to have a team playing with him tonight? Can the Wings’ defensemen score a goal from above the faceoff circles? And the last question is can you stay up and watch the whole thing?

That was from February 3rd. It also came with this lovely little photoshop I did: